My New Favorite Tool

I admit it—I love tools.

I’m not talking about my curling iron (although I’m pretty skilled in wielding a Conair). I love my power driver, torque wrench, drill...

Maybe you’re not “Mrs. Fix It” like me, but I’m sure you have your own “toolbox” of Scriptures and advice to help friends in crisis. But after rummaging for the perfect piece of wisdom, have you ever been frustrated when it didn’t fix the problem? Your friend’s anxiety, brokenness, and confusion were still there, and you ended the conversation feeling helpless and burdened.

Let me tell you about my new favorite tool—one that always works.

I’ve discovered that praying with a person is the most effective tool for any crisis. Here’s why.

A Tool of Power

Prayer changes hearts the way nothing else can, because it directly connects hurting people with the All-Powerful Healer. After hours of fruitless conversation, I’ve seen a friend’s bitterness completely melt away during a simple prayer with her.

Prayer also resolves issues that would otherwise take a long time to work through. I know of a pastoral counselor who requires all of his counselees to spend thirty minutes in prayerful solitude before any session. After prayer, many people report that they no longer need counseling because God has helped them resolve the issue.

A Tool of Precision

Sometimes a friend’s issue is so complex that the root of the problem is hard to find. Or she doesn’t want to share the painful truth about what’s going on. But through prayer, the Holy Spirit can lead you to recognize the real issue, like a skilled pair of needle-nose pliers.

I remember helping a woman who told me the financial struggles she and her husband were facing. As we ended our conversation in prayer, the Holy Spirit led me to ask God to protect her marriage and to renew her love and devotion for her husband. When we said “Amen,” the woman tearfully admitted that earlier that day she had secretly considered leaving her husband and children. But our prayer revealed Satan’s scheme to ruin her marriage, and she felt a new determination to persevere.

A Tool of Peace

Sometimes it seems there is nothing you can do or say to help a desperate situation. But when you pray with a friend, you help her to trust God’s timing, ability, and goodness in her crisis. Then your friend can walk away with a sense of peace even though her situation hasn’t changed. You too will walk away with a burden lifted, because you have left her big problem in bigger Hands than yours.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:6-7, NIV).

The next time a friend calls on you for help, try my new favorite tool—make it a priority to pray with everyone who comes to you for sympathy or advice. (And even if your friend isn’t the “religious” type, remember that hardly anyone will turn down your offer.)

I think you’ll agree— it’s worth the risk of closing your “toolbox of advice” for a moment, to feel the impact of genuine prayer.

LINDSEY PARSONS is the assistant to the Leadership Development Coordinator of the National Women’s Department. She has been involved in a variety of ministries for discipleship, missions, addiction recovery, and evangelism. Lindsey and her husband Bryan live in Springfield, Missouri, where they also coordinate ministry to youth and young adults at Calvary Assembly.