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Inviting—Intentional Vulnerability


Read Proverbs 13:20a, (NIV). 

It is imperative for women to invest in coach/mentor relationships. It is essential for women to cultivate accountable friendships. It’s equally important for women to invite other women into their lives that are more seasoned and have years of wisdom to offer. This type of relationship will necessitate intentional vulnerability. Even if we are mentoring others, we need the wisdom of those older and more experienced.

Winnie the Pooh had it right: ”You can’t stay in your corner of the forest waiting for others to come to you. You have to go to them sometimes.”

The transitive verb invite means “to give occasion for or to ask to come.” When inviting a woman who is more experienced into our lives, we must exercise the following principles:

1.   Embrace teachability—Generational differences, preferences or opinions need not keep us from engaging a different generation. We can view differences as a blessing versus a liability, especially when our relationship is anchored in non-negotiable biblical principles. Wisely shared perspective can build faith, sustain courage, and lead to visionary change and powerful accomplishments for God’s kingdom. The more eager we are to learn from those who are more experienced than we, the more they are eager to teach!

2.   Value reliability—Look for a woman of substance. Seek out someone with a reputation of faithfulness, consistency, appropriate behavior, and the fruit of the Spirit active in her life! Oftentimes, what they have experienced on their journey can shed light on our current circumstances. C.S. Lewis said, “Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one.’”

It’s easy to think that we have friends and know how to be a friend when all we really have are contacts. Neighbors do not know neighbors. Cell phones have caller ID and voicemail to weed out calls. Social networking through Facebook, Instagram and Twitter have in many instances replaced one-on-one connections. Author Joan Chittister said, “We are a private people who live in groups.”[3]


We have an incredible opportunity to expand and deepen our web of relational connections by simply initiating mentor relationships, accountable friendships and intentional vulnerability. The women around us may simply be waiting for us to step out and prioritize one-on-one connections. With God’s help, we can create one-on-one connections with the women in our lives!



[3]The Friendship of Women: The Hidden Tradition of the Bible by Joan Chittister. New York: Blue Bridge Publishers, 2006.


All Scripture quotations, unless otherwise indicated, are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV®. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society®.

“One on One Connections” is published by National Women’s Ministries at women.ag.org, ©2020. Permission to reproduce is limited to personal use or within a teaching setting. All other forms of use are prohibited.